Wednesday, May 3, 2017

The Dull Ache

Sometimes I find it
reminded of passions
past

waiting
silent

cavern of cool walls
wet with rocks
of
tears

smell of
hidden springs
and thirst waiting
for
the taste

body trembles
hand waits
to
reach

skin tingles
with memory
in goose bumps

sensations in mind
body bare
to feel it
to live it
again

to touch
to quench
to stand
under
the tempting
trickle

lips part
nostrils flare
to inhale
to breathe in
this life
again

tongue aches
to taste
to lap in
the cold
intoxicating
icy
heaven

spine goes
rigid
eyes close
with dried up
tears

fists clench
toes curl
heart closes
its door
yet again

standing
in silent mist
watery needles
pierce my ears
to leave
only

the dull ache



Tuesday, May 3, 2016

What I believe in...

They search for 
meaning
I long for
inclusion

they reach out
seeking
to understand my 
seclusion

words used as
hooks
barbed by
memories

family 
and friends
offer vague
pleasantries

we all live
daily
connected and 
dreaming

some of a
heaven
this present
redeeming

others make
living
the greatest
achievement

no lingering
fear
of death or
estrangement

lines drawn 
in sand
ideas
beliefs
theories

hearts bound
by hand
traditions
faiths
memories

we all share
this time
together
this breath

our tables
our laughs
our moments
before death

this notion
of god
this absence
of deity

neither
removes
our whimsical
frailty

fill gaps of
the mind
fill depths of
the heart

the path we must
find
together
not apart

where faith
must
end

where beliefs
must
cease

where ideas
must
mend

where humanity
must
release

the grip on
the mind
the guilt of
the heart

shared values
to find
shared wisdom
impart

history to
show
our destiny
reveal

our resolve
to understand
our world
to heal

we go it 

alone
each moment
decide

reach out
hold back
encourage
deride

today I 
choose
to include
to love

all others
not like me
inspired
from above

each day
life is full
precious
fleeting

will you
love too
while your heart
is still 

beating?

 

Saturday, January 9, 2016

The present creative fury...

So now the fury
held boiling
violent
rages

creative cum
builds
no release
assuages

all doors 
seen
unscalable
walls

confidence
optimism
sanity
falls

inner rage
blinding
much yet
unseen

felt
compressed
not believed

how can one find
the answer
the light
the door

gate keepers
deaf
blind
secure

decades of 
stories
feelings
no one 
to tell

paintings unseen 
beautiful
vivid curse
enchanting 
spell

turbulent creative 
heart
battles mind

ego sees
nothing but
pointless struggles
to find

all that is left
is juice
with no
chalice

compassion
rage
tears
malice

so much 
to give
such depth
to reveal

bangkok ladyboy
standing
embarassed
waiting

grown man
artist
unknown
hating

doors with no
knob
no opening
no handle

eyes that see 
nothing
no answer
no angle

public asleep
when 
awakened
demands
pablum

machine nods
yes
holds cup
to its
rectum.
 

Tuesday, November 10, 2015

The Darkness Dying to Die

My dying 
darkness
lies
waits
trying

To let go
to leave
to cease
its
crying

the mind
the soul
the heart
denying

the pain
the darknes
the sorrow
sighing

wishes
for life
unseen
unheard
unknown
unlived

the other side
I know not
could be
has yet
to give

one morsel
one taste
one breath
one beat

no hope
no love
no chance
no feat

now patient
I wait
to stop
this trial

to give
no more
no life
to denial

so slowly
this pace
lingers on
while I 
try

to let
despair
rest

to let
ego
die 
 

Saturday, June 13, 2015

I choose to live

Feeling this
feeling
not running
away

still in this
moment
breathing
today

one life
too large
one moment
to live

fears to now
face
meaning to
give

past is now
gone
present to
choose

patterns of
mind
nothing to
lose

break from the
cycle
move
just one step

grateful for 
choices
free from
regret

open before me
to hell with 
the circles

I have my
own future
no reliance on
miracles

the comfort says
don't
you'll fail
you can't

the echoes 
my mantra
past life's
chant

dear friends
see
push
love
relate

feels like all
sit
watch
wonder
and wait

so here in this
moment
I choose
yet again

to fight
to love
to step
to win

Saturday, February 28, 2015

Those Eyes...

Had wondered before that moment
how long it would take
now a sudden torrent
alive in its wake

eyes that stop gravity
my whole world now floating
thoughts rendered immobile
face not emoting

instantaneous shock
then all free to feel
your light that pours out
the heart eyes reveal

there you are finally
my lovely surprise 
heart
delighted

body now rushing
your face
eyes and smile
ignited

years in the making
notes
likes
birthday wishes

chance for the taking
smiles
hugs
but no kisses

all that one dreams
of a moment
in time

without warning
appears
no reason
nor rhyme

now there they are
eyes 
that have haunted
my thoughts
my dreams

so bright and alive
these dark
alluring
sun beams

looking up warmly
wide with 
heart
brimming

this moment eternal
the memory
never 
dimming

all I had wished
imagined
now able
to express

what to say
what to share
what to show
or repress

no nerves
no tension
no caution
to forego

all melted away
with those 
unforgettable eyes
and your sweet
"Hello". 


Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Perspective with purpose

Moments to wish for
touches
glances
breaths

feelings to overcome
lies
urges
tests

dare to be present
feeling
living
breathing

to yield thoughts
judgments
bitterness
seething

age lends perspective
obscures
visions
pursuits
of haste

reminds of mortality
grandeur
purpose
nobility
laid waste

time renders all
intentions
shown false

desires
fade quickly
windows
to walls

chances to dream
then live
in this
state

glances back
gazing
why
did I wait

the artist
the dreamer
the boy
the man

the painting
the vision
the frolic
the plan

today
they blend
finally
become one

not so many
days left
to have joy
fun

each moment
to live
so deeply
a father

a teller
a giver
a pillar
a lover

steps to take
fully
whole
complete

the dream
to now
live

appears
at my
feet.